I haven't written anything since Haiti, maybe because I'm still sorting out my feelings about the whole experience. I just watched Hinjio's video again, and I truly miss that place. There are sick people everywhere, illnesses that can't be fixed, ideals and perceptions that will never change, and yet I'm drawn back to it. I think it is the stamina of the people there. They don't appreciate their tenacity because that is all they know.
While you are there, you're not concerned about the dent in your fender, that your wireless doesn't work and your house isn't quite keeping up with the Jones's. You're thinking about providing something valuable for people that literally have nothing. Who cares if you can't sleep at night because it's so hot - I can go home and not walk for 3 days to get basic health care. I am blessed.
I've always felt like I never amounted to much. I have a degree from Purdue, and I was on the right cooperate track before having kids... but since then, I've "meandered." (If Wildwood wouldn't have been such a colossal failure, I guess that would have been my after-kids-career.) But as I quickly approach the age of 50, I'm still trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up. I'll keep plugging away, with the thought in the back of my mind, that maybe this whole FOTOCH thing was in the works all the time. God has has a huge sense of humor. I know in my heart John and I were never meant to be couch-potato seniors. Maybe this is our calling. We'll see.
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