Sunday, November 28, 2010

Life

Life.  Is.  Hard.

The absolute, most gut wrenching thing for a parent, is to watch their children experience this.  It's one thing for me to go through a rough time, but seeing my children go through it takes it to a whole new level of anxiety and worry - for me.  Heck, for all I know, they could unload on me, feel better about things, and then go on their merry way and not think anything about their cares and troubles - that somehow, they are all transferred to me.  But I know that's not always the case.  Umm Katelynn?  You think it's hard now?  It's just as hard - but different.  It's emotional.  What's harder?  I really don't know.

Hannah will probably get mad at me for putting this out there, but her and her boyfriend broke it off this weekend.  I like The Boy, I really do. But what are the odds of ANY high school relationship making it, let alone a long distance one?  The fact that the chances are very slim doesn't make things any easier for anyone.  It can happen, but it takes a lot of work.

One of my ultimate gifts on my Christmas list,  this and every year - I want my kids to be happy with their choices and to share their lives with the right person.

However many years down the road, I look forward to welcoming new people into our family.  Until then, I wish everyone a good, not-too-rocky journey.

2 comments:

  1. I just deleted half of this post because it was way too preachy. Must be because I posted it on a Sunday.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I can only assume how my Fb posts must come across...I am only half serious, most of the time...I am extremely blessed. I thank God for that, in prayer, Every. Single. Day. He knows my heart, He knows my soul...He knows our financial situation and He knows we put money in the offering every Sunday and in the donation jars in the checkout line at the grocery store.
    My kids are a H A N D F U L! They are perfect angels compared to the things my cousin goes through with her girl and The Girls behavior disorders.
    My mom is a saint. The woman I look up to most...my Super Hero. If I end up half the woman she is, I will count myself as blessed. If I'm half the crazy my dad is, was, blessed again.

    That all said...don't stop 'preaching'...you never know who your thoughts may strike a chord with. I understand how your heart aches for Hannah...even as grown as she is. Though she won't ever admit it, I know when my mom cries, sometimes, its for me and my heartache. I understand that's how it goes...it sucks. Emma put on a pullover fleece the other day that was very cute and all I saw, as use to it as I am, was her scar peeking out the top. And then my brain immediately went to "well, what if the kids see this when she's in school, and in a high school locker room and how many 13yr old ass am I going to have to kick???". And then with Logan...

    Life. Is. Hard. I realize that. I am Scean's daughter. I will get THAT tattooed on my body because I KNOW it, and after your posts on Haiti, I know even more how blessed I truly am.

    I love you. I love you husband. I love your kids, and have soooo many memories with them when they WERE kids. I love your blog. I wish you were closer. I hope you come for St. Pats. And now I feel rambly and preachy. Damnit.

    Hug Hannah for me. And while I am sure she doesn't need reminding and I know it isn't comforting on any level...everything, EVERYTHING happens for a reason.

    ReplyDelete