I just re-read what I previously wrote, and I think I come off a little harsh. I like buying gifts for people I love! I love showing people I really care about them! I think I'm just jaded into thinking that some people equate the number of dollars spent on a person = how much you love them. Not so.
Have you ever given anyone a gift and you just knew you nailed it - that it was the best thing in the whole world you were ever capable of giving them? What a feeling. It is a rare thing, let me tell you. I think the closest I came was when I stole Mom and Dad's 8mm home movies and had them converted to VHS (yes, this was a while ago...). I just knew they would get a real kick out of it. It was personal. And it was good. And the time I gave my Aunt Sis a little box I made in 4-H camp. I slaved over that thing and was so proud when I gave it to her. She loved it - or pretended to. Doesn't matter, because I gave her my all. Who wouldn't appreciate that from anyone?
If you haven't guessed, I'm working through all my holiday issues right here and now. On line? A little weird maybe, but whatever. Holidays have certainly changed for me over the years. Mom and Dad left this earth much too early, and my holidays haven't been the same since. So I try to imitate my experiences with them - low key holidays (never on THE holiday - too much stress there) where everyone came together (on a day that was more convenient than the actual holiday) and was just allowed to... be.
That's what I want my matriarchal legacy to be - that everyone gets together around the celebrated holiday and is able to enjoy each other's company. Well, as much as family can. :-)
I remember the Christmas (in January of course!) of the VHS tapes! Mostly what I remember is you yelling about having to share a pony ride with some kid named Carl. And I agree that as far as gifts go, that one was right up near the top of the list!.
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